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Solitude

by Hollow Heart

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1.
Namesake 02:39
Darkness rules my life When I think of all the times That you were still here with me The pretense to your existence I smile whilst I stand above your grave And even though I miss you You’re the monster I slayed and the person I’m leaving behind me now You were something inspiring But you were never there And you never cared for anyone Run towards the dark As if this was your only friend When it was the light That pulled you in Sharing namesake does not make us the same Your life was filled with gluttony and greed Was this the person you had always wished to be? I look at my reflection and all I see in you is me But I am nothing like you That’s how I set myself free I’m nothing like you I set myself free
2.
Drown 04:24
Pushing myself to the brink of sanity In a realm where I will lose myself and all I know For my own self greed and vanity I'm just so tired of starting again when I have tried so hard To reach out to serenity Keep feeding reasons down my throat Of why I'll live my life alone (Desperate) I tell the world that I am happy and content Staring faceless in the crowd I look up to the sky when all I want to do is drown Desolation is my only friend The one who stood by through all my pain and my suf-fer-ing Born to rot, and waiting to die What's the point in living When every step Just leads me to death? I will not end here I'll wait another day To a moment where life makes sense The sun will shine its rays And maybe this plague will cleanse My happiness will stay Please, help me find my way Please, make everything okay My lies lead me astray So I need a guide to light my way From the mess I made From the people who made my life concave From this mind that destroys me day by day Just let me drown and drift away Awaken anew without these scars Forgetting the man who I once was I resurface to the sea from my death I am ma-le-vo-lant (Desperation, Desolation) I've tried so hard To exorcise the demons in my heart Torn between a soul That wants to be selfless and kind And watch Everything die Leave me with my pain I'm just a burden of sorrow I do not wish to remain To see the first light of tomorrow I'll bleed my life away My demons are here to stay
3.
Solitude 03:25
Explaining My Depression to My Mother: A Conversation Mom, my depression is a shape shifter. One day it is as small as a firefly in the palm of a bear, The next, it’s the bear. On those days I play dead until the bear leaves me alone. I call the bad days: “the Dark Days.” Mom says, “Try lighting candles.” When I see a candle, I see the flesh of a church, the flicker of a flame, Sparks of a memory younger than noon. I am standing beside her open casket. It is the moment I learn every person I ever come to know will someday die. Besides Mom, I’m not afraid of the dark. Perhaps, that’s part of the problem. Mom says, “I thought the problem was that you can’t get out of bed.” I can’t. Anxiety holds me a hostage inside of my house, inside of my head. Mom says, “Where did anxiety come from?” Anxiety is the cousin visiting from out-of-town depression felt obligated to bring to the party. Mom, I am the party. Only I am a party I don’t want to be at. Mom says, “Why don’t you try going to actual parties, see your friends?” Sure, I make plans. I make plans but I don’t want to go. I make plans because I know I should want to go. I know sometimes I would have wanted to go. It’s just not that fun having fun when you don’t want to have fun, Mom. You see, Mom, each night insomnia sweeps me up in his arms dips me in the kitchen in the small glow of the stove-light. Insomnia has this romantic way of making the moon feel like perfect company. Mom says, “Try counting sheep.” But my mind can only count reasons to stay awake; So I go for walks; but my stuttering kneecaps clank like silver spoons held in strong arms with loose wrists. They ring in my ears like clumsy church bells reminding me I am sleepwalking on an ocean of happiness I cannot baptize myself in. Mom says, “Happy is a decision.” But my happy is as hollow as a pin pricked egg. My happy is a high fever that will break. Mom says I am so good at making something out of nothing and then flat-out asks me if I am afraid of dying. No. I am afraid of living. You will never remember my face For I am nothing to you I have sacrificed my whole life Into thinking I was something more than worthless
4.
Impoverished 03:17
Across the world in the blink of an eye On a journey to seek new breaths of life Self searching in foreign lands Hoping to be a better man Poverty, no wealth in sight I search for a new beginning The aspiration of what I might do here Will leave a legacy in my own mind and heart Outcasted from their own society These people have been given no chance Across the world in the blink of an eye On a journey to seek new breaths of life Self searching in foreign lands Hoping to be a better man Losing myself in these wastelands Losing hope in humanity Who am I to teach When I have never really lived And I am left with nothing to choose And nowhere to hide And then I hear these words from impoverished youth Where I’m poor in wealth I'm rich in knowledge I can never forget these words I cannot lose sight Of what is real in my life And who would think And who would think That such few words Could have such meaning
5.
Fragility 04:17
This world on your shoulders I know that it is hard to bear Feelings of solitude Just know the weight can be shared Don't be misguided by hate in others Follow your heart, let your mind guide you Life is yours to make from the very start Fate is a lifeless shadow in the dark His Existence was never important I've walked these nights alone But you don't have to be like me Moving forward into prosperity The person you were is not the one you will become Cut the anchors beneath you This world on your shoulders I know that it is hard to bear Feelings of solitude Just know the weight can be shared Don't be misguided by hate in others Follow your heart, let your mind guide you I only admire my heart After beaten by worlds of hate I only show love To those around me Fight against the fears that hold you back But never give up on who you are What drives you to a future unclear My sights are set to the unknown And though I'm scared This is why I must stand alone My path I must endure on my own To see the man above is nothing but a lie I chose this life of light to guide me Through a world of darkness That wants to end me But that won't fucking happen

about

Solitude is a 5 track EP created by Hollow Heart toraise awareness to mental illness through the band members' experiences with states of depression, anxiety and loneliness.

credits

released November 1, 2015

Music written by Hollow Heart

Recorded and Mixed by Fletcher Matthews and Clayton Segelov at The Brain Recording Studios, Sydney

Mastered by Josh Schroeder at Random Awesome Studios, Michigan

Artworks by Damon Raffaele

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Hollow Heart Sydney, Australia

Sydney Melodic Hardcore band, Hollow Heart. Here, you can find all our releases, from singles to future EP's and albums.

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